It was over like a bolt of lightning

Let's see

It's July 14?

My Husband and I officially separated on March 14.

I was a mess. No amount of pinterest could ease my soul. In fact I'm still over dosing on it a bit as we speak. Though I brought it up, it was unavoidable and I even begged for him to come back afterwards. However peeps, he was gone long before the night we discussed it.

The Man I married was and is gone....that second deployment brought someone back that I didn't know. He does not wish to get help, and he wouldn't even to save our marriage, so I had to go. I can't always do it for him especially when he didn't even want me around anymore. I was desperate but not that far gone. Well, maybe, it's a little blurry at this point.

Anger issues were becoming a little too much and maybe it was PTSD but I feel that it was just me. That I drive men to go crazy....We will have to see through this. I guess what I'm getting at is that it was both our faults but a line was crossed on the emotional abuse front and maybe I pushed him enough but he pushed me too and I never crossed that line. It doesn't make me the better person, it just left me broken in the end.

Fast forward, one trip to England, one move back into my Parents' and now one move to Louisiana ahead of me and I am a much better person. Again. This probably sounds horrible but it was as if this part of me was handed back and I just ran with it. Seriously, it was as if someone handed me an Ikea gift card, my ass was flooring it. For those of you who know me, this is impressive, I don't run; therefore if you know me and we go camping and there is a bear attack...we all know I will be the girl you don't have to worry about outrunning. That bear will be snacking on me like a twinkie in the two seconds it takes the rest of you fast asses to get to the car. Enjoy your life that I bestow upon you when that happens. ((I would say YOLO but it goes against my religion)) If you are having grammar fits, don't worry....I will eventually go back and fix this. Eventually.

One week ago I made a decision to go back to school where my ridiculous decision making all started; Louisiana Tech University. For those of you creepers, please do not try and find me there,  I will have pepper spray, and I took martial arts for six weeks, you've been warned.

A lot happened in that week while I was visiting friends in Louisiana. First of all I realized I missed that hell hole, do not judge it is a love-hate relationship, and that second I can go ahead and finish my degree because what the hell else was I going to do? I could have gone to a couple of other schools and started from the ground up or I could pick one where I had been more than half way through. That's right folks, I stupidly left school to go marry a Marine, then I got knocked up, then I couldn't go back to school, then we couldn't afford it, then we could afford it, then his love for me vanished like rain on a hot summer day. This is where we start this chapter of blogging. I've had other failed attempts at blogging, and they sucked, so don't be surprised when this thing goes down the drain.

Being my age and going back to school is always an adventure I'm sure. The whole having a kid thing will make me a huge hit when I show up to school with toddler snacks tucked in my hair and crayons instead of pens. Best part of it all? I will be not much better off than a hobo I know, financially, and yes, I do know a hobo. Have your eyes started tearing up at my commas? No? I haven't tried hard enough. Annnnnny ways. This is my first post saying, here I am world, not quite as broken as I have been, definitely not shiny, but most assuredly here to kick some ass, take some names, and show my Daughter that I am not a complete and utter loser. The Ex? I could give two shits how he sees me, one things for sure he is not getting this voluptuous vixen back.